Rules for bad programmers

Simplify:
- Remove as many parameters as possible
- Remove as many properties from a class as possible

Don't repeat yourself

Use as many immutable datatypes as possible. Efficiency is only for good programmers. Not for bad programmers.
Only use simple names for you are lazy and you always make typing errors.

Create only short methods for you are too stupid to understand long methods. Not to talk about making changes in long methods.
Make conditional expressions as short as possible for you hardly ever understand them or they give you unexpected results.

One strong trend I'm seeing in young devs that enables me to run rings around them when there's a halfway complex process to develop: they're too lazy to write classes.

They'll write any amount of awkward code that's difficult to understand, maintain, and even get right in the first place in preference to writing a class.

This situation should be the other way around: in some cases, object oriented programming didn't exist in mainstream development when I was their age.